Oooh girl, if you could see me right now.
We are in official Survival Mode here. I’m on practically no sleep right now, for a number of reasons. One main reason is that the baby is sick and SHE IS GETTING FOUR TEETH AT THE SAME TIME. Who does that, right??? Who gets four teeth? At once? I am out.side.my.damn.mind.
Last night Miabelle cried almost the whole entire night. It was awful. And so sad, because you could tell from the way she was crying – and screaming – that she was in mad pain. Besides motrin and nursing her, there’s not much I can do. And as I’ve said before, I am unable to sleep whilst nursing.
The no sleep thing has been going on for awhile now, but it’s been slowly gaining speed lately and last night it hit a high point.
I called the pediatrician’s office to get some advice. The nurse insisted I bring the baby in because maybe she has an ear infection. It’s the coldest day of the year, guys. In Buffalo NY. That’s like saying it’s pasta day in Italy.
We are known for our cold winters but you know it’s damn cold when you can hardly inhale the air because it’s freezing your throat. We went to the ped’s office and lo and behold, no ear infection. But I did start crying like a big fat baby in front of the doctor when she asked if I was okay. Probably because my hair looks like a squirrel’s nest and I have circles under my eyes despite my nice makeup and I look like a crazy person.
When I am going on no sleep, I am not a fun person to be around. I get mad and cry very verrrrry easily. As we were driving, I saw a billboard of a woman’s depressed looking face. Next to her face were the words, “I don’t want to lose my home.”
This is all it takes, folks.
“I don’t want you to lose your home either,” I whispered to the face, as tears slipped down my cheeks.
Before we jumped back on the highway, my husband bought me a Wendy’s meal. I got a packet of ketchup with my fries.
“How do you open this stupid thing?” I asked him, trying to open it with my teeth. (shut up, I was desperate)
“I would not do that if I were you.” he warned. “You’re gonna get that all over yourself if it bursts open.”
“I’m not stupid.” I said like a wild animal. “I can open a packet of ketchup like a normal person.”
“Okay.” he said.
The ketchup burst open all over my clothes after my second try. A huge glop of it was all over the front of my jacket. With tears of sorrow in my eyes, I dipped my fry onto my jacket in an effort to be resourceful. Then I saw that it was all over my jeans near my knee. I dipped my fry in that, too.
“Kill two birds with one stone,” I told myself. The bird lover in me always shudders when I say that.
|It just breaks my heart.|
I kept finding more ketchup.
On my sleeve.
On my bag.
I found all the ketchup spots and dipped my fries in them. I know, it’s disgusting but I was not thinking clearly.
|Almost like a game of “Twister”.|
|For Heaven’s sake, don’t waste any.|
Finally I had found all the ketchup. I picked up the ketchup packet again (really, what the h is wrong with me) and squirted what was left onto my last fry. It squirted all over the front of my jacket again. Has anyone over the age of 5 ever cried about ketchup on their jacket? I think I broke a record today.
An 18 wheeler drove beside us and I could feel the driver staring at me as he went by. I’ll bet he was wondering if he should call 911 for this lady who was casually eating her fries despite having been stabbed multiple times.
I don’t know. I’m just so tired lately, I don’t want to be annoying with my problems through my blog but then I realize hey my problems are a little bit funny.
And so I’ll share them with all you other tired moms (and dads).
And other people who are tired.
And people who aren’t tired. At all. I hate you.