I have a very expressive face. People say they can always tell what I’m thinking just by looking at it. I try hard not to let all my inner f bombs and what – the – hells show on my face, but honestly it’s like telling Donald Trump to tame that brassy blonde wave of glory on his head. That orange cat nest ain’t goin nowhere and we all know it. It’s next to impossible.
Last week, I started running again. Let me define “running”: I don’t run the entire time, rather I run in spurts. I tell myself “you’re going to run from here to that tree down there!” And then I run to the tree and sometimes I run past the tree to a fire hydrant or another tree or perhaps to a person who happens to be strolling along.
I run and run and I feel like Carl Lewis winning the Olympics, but really I look like a drunk person running from a swarm of gnats. Then I walk fast for a long time. But that’s okay because I’m exercising! And that’s good enough.
I save my most expressive faces for when I’m running. Here is an example:
No one gets in my way, because they can see that I’m here to get to work. I’m hustling. I’m pulling myself up by the bootstraps.
They can also see that I look deranged.
Not only are my facial expressions obvious, but so is my breathing. Skilled runners can control their breathing. They breath so quietly, you would never even hear them take a single breath.
I breathe like a mother pig whose bucket of food has just arrived after a long hot day in the mud. There’s no denying my presence.
There’s actually an elderly couple who sit in their driveway each evening when I run by, and they turn their heads to look at me long before I get to their house. They can hear my panting from about four houses away. They smile politely at me when I run by, but I bet they wish I would just knock it off.
The good news is I’ve done about three miles every day since last Friday – except for today because my body needed a rest. That’s 21 miles in seven days! It feels pretty good even though I’m not going very fast. It clears my head and it’s great exercise, so that’s good enough for me right now.
Man, I’m exhausted! That’s all for tonight. See you tomorrow for day 6 of my 7 day blogging challenge!